Days of Tracking: 2
As I work my way into the idea of the long-haul that this weight loss experience will need to be, I am even now preparing. Today's blog entry concerns the mental preparations. I've lost weight before. It feel very good. But there is a mental disconnect that somehow defeats the success. Of all of the preparations I am making, I believe this is the most important. There are three key mental preparations I see as important additions to my prior weight loss efforts:
- Unity with MBWM (we're in this together),
- Paradigm shift from I can do it alone to I need external assistance (in this case, through paid re-training at Weight Watchers), and
- Paying attention to the compulsive nature in me (Overeaters Anonymous).
These three things are important aspects of how things are different from prior weight loss efforts. Previously, I worked separately from my wife (though she was intensely supportive), I felt learning on my own was enough, and I avoided addressing the compulsive nature in me. I feel these things are important. In the past while dieting, I would eat one piece of pizza without worry and with enjoyment, even if it had mushrooms on it. I would lose weight because I would look on the second piece of pizza as death. That worked wonderfully. And then I would grow tired of the mental effort. And I would eat that fifth piece of pizza, thinking death never tasted so good.
And I have a series of images labeled as goals which have been described in prior entries, that I need to use to uplift and care for my wife when she's having difficulties with the weight loss. I need to use these motivations to rewire my thinking by making better choices under direction. And I open admit I have become powerless over food - that my life has become unmanageable. So unmanageable, in fact, that I have rewritten the course of the end of this year by leaving ITT and teaching behind. It is quite drastic, but the unmanageable nature of my weight needs my fullest attention. About the only thing more drastic would be signing up for Biggest Loser.
I am quite intelligent, well educated, and perpetually curious. I know more than enough to know what I need to do. But my own experience has shown that I have not used this knowledge to my benefit. So I must do more. That more is found in the hope built around the three additions above.
And I would like to add my thanks to this entry. My thanks to those that have encouraged me with a simple click. The numbers of page views keeps going up. And I am in awe and I am encouraged.
Be well in the embrace of your joie de vivre, life is meant to be a joy,
P.S.: I keep losing the weight, but it keeps finding me again.