Friday, February 28, 2014

The Ghosts of Birthdays Present

Post Number: 146
Review of Yesterday's Progress
     Daily PPV Used/Left: 44/25 of 69 (Goal: 30/39)
     Pedometer Reading:  - {Pedometer clip broken}
     Meetings Attended: Missed Overeaters Anonymous
     Exercise Completed: At the Y -
          Recumbent Elliptical Machine
               20 minutes & 3.12 miles @  Level 8
          Swam Laps (10 laps, 500 yards)
     M-W's Word of the DayCheeseparing

Murphic Entropy is proud to sponsor today's blog entry.

Already having a rough time of things? Letting yourself go just a little? We'll be thrilled to add in some additional complications. Let's take a look at Eliot, a typical example of how our services can complicate your life.

Eliot has had quite a bit of success. But something's eating him. Even he isn't sure what it is. And when something is eating Eliot, Eliot eat something. But he's chosen today to push harder than ever to make better decisions. We just had to laugh. Poor Eliot. Thinking he can control all those influences.

Let's watch as Eliot returns home. He has a set of plans in mind for his day. They are good plans. But we're going to step in and do our thing. He things that his kids will be up and having breakfast when he gets home. He's half right. They are up. He switches gears. He is adaptable after all. He calls his mom. He's supposed to visit her and it is her birthday. We'll be taking advantage of that later. He knows that his mom just might be willing to take the family to breakfast. Since no ones eating, this is an important piece of information.

He calls. Everyone wishes Grandma a Happy Birthday. Aww... Isn't that nice. And then he begins to discuss plans. Yes, she is willing to take the family to breakfast. Now is the time to hit the road. While he's just returned from the gym and is certainly ready to leave, it takes a little more time for everyone else to leave. Long enough that breakfast is no longer an option. This is just one small step in our plan to continue to push against Eliot's progress.

But before we get to that, let's look at what happens first. First, his mom needs to get bills paid. She only pays in money orders. With that in mind, he heads to the supermarket. He leaves the kids in the car because he's only getting money orders. His mom doesn't want to do any shopping. This is fine with him. Except, there are a few things that she wants to pick up for her oldest grand-daughter's bridal shower. She has several things in mind. And while she's thinking of these, she things of a few other things she needs. But she's going to keep it short.

And this plays to our advantage because his temper is a little short. His mom says she is getting one more thing. Eliot wants to get one thing on his list. They separate and agree to meet in the toy section where his mom is looking for something. Eliot grabs his one thing quickly but cannot find his mom. Eliot learns by text that his kids are acting up. He needs to get out there. And his mom has finished checking out while he was wandering around wondering what is going on. What's going on? We are! We are Murphic Entropy.

And now, the first meal of the day for the family is about to happen. His mom wants tacos. They head to Taco Bell. This turns out to be a good choice. As they drive by, Wendy's has 7 cars backed up behind the order speaker. McDonald's has 5 cars backed up behind their two order speakers. At Taco Bell, they are able to drive right up to the order speaker. That enticement was our doing as well. First, he has to deal with a time-consuming confusion of ordering for the family. Long enough that taco bell has 7 cars backed up behind him when he is finally done ordering. And since he is last, he orders the smallest looking burrito, completely missing the opportunity for something relatively healthy.

But the smallest looking burrito is not healthy. At this stage, he is more concerned with getting fed and moving on the promised drive than paying attention to what he's eating and how long it takes. That is what is motivating Eliot.

Well, there were several other issues he had to face. We weren't going to ease up at all. Here is a short list of our activities as we kept up pressure on Eliot.

  1. Iguana conned Lemur into allowing him to eat something he was allergic to, allowing us to foul Eliot's environment
  2. His mom needed to make a total of four trips to the supermarket. So much for not wanting to shop. You can almost see his blood pressure expand the blood vessels in his temples.
  3. A little ways into their drive for his mom, Jaguar complains of an urgent need for a restroom. This throws a wrench into the process of a relaxing drive.
  4. And then there was the stop by the bakery. Our only failure of the day. But we point it out to show that we are constantly working to improve our success.
  5. On the final trip to the mega-mart, his mom wants to aid his exercise attempts. She requests the opportunity to purchase exercise DVDs. His kids then go nuts requesting DVDs and CDs for themselves. This is one of our most priceless moments. Here it is grandma's birthday and the kids are ending up with the presents.
  6. Then there was the preparations for the Scout banquet. Eliot needed to take over making the chocolate dipped marshmallows so his beloved wife could get in the shower. While he didn't eat any whole marshmallows, dipped or not, we won't mention how many times he licked up chocolate. It would be gloating.
  7. And then there was the Scout banquet itself. Another stroke of genius on our part. First, it kept him from the spiritual strength of OA. Second, it placed him around hot dogs and chips. He hadn't had hot dogs in ages. We managed to tempt him into eating one and a little more. And while he didn't actually eat a bag of chips, he nibbled enough from his kids for taste every flavor except the ranch Doritos.
All-in-all, this was one of our best days in pushing Eliot around. The clearest representation of that is in the fact that he consumed more points yesterday than he has in any single day for months. He ate more than he did in two of his better days. He claim yesterday as a victor for Murphic Entropy.

Call on us by name. We're already there, but at least then you'll be acknowledging our presence.

Murphic Entropy - Taking pride in our craft by crafting directed destruction one life at a time.

Yours in the success that will return later, hopefully later today,


P.S.: When you really want change, reinforcement will come from your heart. - Doc Childre, Deborah Rozman and Matthew McKay, Transforming Anger

No comments:

Post a Comment